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Funny Test Answers

Funny Test Answers: The Collection

Today I present my collection of Funny Test Answers. They’re real, they’re fresh, and they’re hilarious. So lighten up and enjoy ’em.

As a middle school teacher, many of these come from my own classroom, but I’m not above collecting funny test answers from other teachers. So I’ve decided to make this post an ongoing collection of funny student stuff. Most of it will be funny test or exam answers, but I’m certainly not going to pick nits here.

So stop back often, I’ll be updating this as I acquire things.
Funny Test Answer math
This post is broken into 3 parts:

  • Funny student answers of my own (written or oral)
  • Links to funny answers I find, and
  • Examples of funny test answers I’ve found on the internet (pictures).

I’ve been saying for awhile that I should start collecting more examples student work. It can be pretty amusing. Just think what we’d be missing if some quick thinking professor or teacher hadn’t thought to capture these funny writing samples, or these funny test answers before handing them back. I’m certainly glad I captured these humorous examples of student work.

So without further ado . . .

Funny Test Answers of my own:

Treasure Island Quiz Pt I

The Test Question: What Killed Billy Bones?

Funny Student Test Answer:

Billy Bones (a.ka-the captain), died of a stroke. It was most likely caused by drinking too much rum, believe it or not. Just goes to show that doctors are always right. Except when they leave medical instruments in your stomach after performing gastric bypass surgery.

The Exam Question: What is a “miscreant”?
Funny Test Answer:

A miscreant is someone who behaves badly. Like Shamoo, when he purposely lands on top of his trainer because he is having a bad day. Pirates would also be a good example.

The Test Question: How would you characterize Jim so far?
Funny Exam Answer:

Jim, so far, seems to be an all-around good guy. Honest, nice, basically what every girl is looking for in a boyfriend.

Treasure Island Quiz Pt III

The Test Question: Describe what a quay is.

Funny Student Test Answer:

A quay is a baby quail that has leopard spots and is known for its skills in magic and mind reading.

Question: What surprised Jim at the Spy Glass Inn?
Funny Exam Answer:

While Jim was at the Spy Glass Inn, he was very surprised to find out that he had a very small freckle on the tip of his muscular man elbow.

Treasure Island Quiz Pt VI

The Question: What does Jim reveal to the pirates when he is asked to choose between joining them or not?

Funny Student Test Answer:

What Jim reveals to the pirates is that he doesn’t want to join them because they’re fat and have no lives.

Name the area on the map near Ben Gunn’s cave where the gig will beach.

I didn’t understand the question. I believe it to be worded badly. Therefor I don’t think you should take points off. But I think the answer is the Gallows.

Another funny answer to the same question:

The area on the map near Ben Gunn’s cave was . . . I have no idea. Because, yeah, I don’t know, and wait. . . it was an X on the map where he was going.

Why does Jim take “French leave” from the stockade (2 reasons).

Jim tells them that he won’t be in their group because they suck, pretty much!

Looking for more funny stuff?

That wasn’t enough for you? You want more silliness? Well, I’ll keep a weather eye out for more silly answers (and maybe a few visitors would also like to contribute). I’ll post ’em here when I get ’em.

But until then I’ve got a few related links to share. Check ’em out if you have a few minutes and you want a good laugh. I can’t vouch for the authenticity of any of this, but, like I said, if you’ve got the time on your hands anyway–some of it’s pretty funny. . .

    Links to More Funny Test Answers

  • More silly student test answers. There is some overlap with the link I provided above, but some unique content as well.
  • These funny exam answers are supposed to be actual responses to driver’s exam questions. Personally I find these a bit hard to believe.
  • This series of funny test answers actually illustrates a great story about Niels Bohr, “the only person from Denmark to win the Nobel prize for Physics.” The author of this blog obviously plagiarized this because I’ve found the same exact story (same exact wording) on other websites. I probably shouldn’t even link to this blogger because he didn’t bother to give credit to who/where ever he found it–but I’m too lazy right now to find another source. Plus this guy also has a pretty good collection of funny exam answers on the rest of his site–even if he is ripping it off.
  • Ok. So these aren’t answers from students, but excuses written by parents for kids that missed school or have special needs or circumstances. I’ve seen this before but it’s still pretty funny. This, as ridiculous as much of it is, I do believe. I’ve read too much adult writing not to.
  • I think these funny questions and responses are best read out loud–even if you’re by yourself. Or maybe that’s just my auditory quirk. Anyway, this doesn’t have anything to do with school, but it does relate to presentation and language. It’s a list of things that have been said in court. Some of the stuff that comes out of the lawyers mouths is hilarious. A quick example:

Lawyer: “When he went, had you gone and had she, if she wanted to and were able, for the time being excluding all the restraints on her not to go, gone also, would he have brought you, meaning you and she, with him to the

  • Alright, and finally (for now anyway), I think I might capture a few of these funny exam images and use them randomly in tests, quizzes or assignments that I give in the future–just to see what kind of response I get. Just ignore the joke about blonds.

So like I said, there you have my collection of funny quizzes, jokes, and all kinds of hilarious stuff. If you’d like to try another fun couple of quizzes there are lots of them. Some are about superheros, some about nerds, some personality quizzes will even tell you what kind of exciting or silly person you are. Look elsewhere on my site for more fun jokes and funny quizzes about superheros.

“Tracking something,” said Winnie-the-Pooh very mysteriously.


Pooh was walking round and round in a circle, thinking of something else, and when Piglet called to him, he just went on walking.

“Hallo!” said Piglet, “what are you doing?”

“Hunting,” said Pooh.

“Hunting what?”

“Tracking something,” said Winnie-the-Pooh very mysteriously.

“Tracking what?” said Piglet, coming closer.

“That’s just what I ask myself. I ask myself, What?”

“What do you think you’ll answer?”

“I shall have to wait until I catch up with it,” said Winnie-the-Pooh. “Now, look there.” He pointed to the ground in front of him. “What do you see there?”

Let the fun begin.  Any master trackers or puzzle solvers out there? Would anyone like to try to solve the mystery of this very cool (I think) track I took a picture of in my yard last week? Just leave a comment with your educated guesses.

First one to get it right gets a secret email address to an artist blogger who will draw your face if you send him a picture (of your face), and then post it on his blog.

Hint: More clues can be found in at least one of my previous posts.

das wiked. buh yo! u wanna get tada nxt levl? wateva.

Now, I know what I said, and I meant every word of it. But then, I got this comment to a post,

“das wiked. som kid in ma clas did dat. evry1 freaked, even da teacha!it waz jokes, Buh… she went 2 ur web, got da secret n printed it n gave it 2 us 2day! Da fun onli lasted 4 2 days, nofair, yo! N it dusnt wrk onma computa. Wat a rip off , man.”

and I started thinking . . .


Secrets of a Flash in the Pan

Greg, an alert reader from–well, I’m not sure where he’s from–left this comment on my About page yesterday:

So, help me out here. Your blog is getting major hits, top five on WordPress, and while I respect your writing, and it is interesting at some level–to what do you attribute so much traffic? Do you have a lot of family? No sex, no sports, no mean spirited politics. What’s the secret?

Well Greg, normally I’d reply under your comment. But I thought it was such a good question that to leave it buried in the bowels of my About page just seemed too much of an injustice.


Global Warming: A Free Interdisciplinary Curriculum


The picture above is of my family (minus me, I’m taking the picture . . .duh) and Will Steger. It was taken at this year’s St. Paul Winter Carnival in January. The temperature that day was about 5 degrees and the wind was really kicking out of the north, so the wind chill was actually somewhere around -20.

Notice Nora’s (the youngest) facial expression. Priceless.

Anyway, Steger was using the event to kick off his latest adventure–a 1200-mile, four-month-long dogsled expedition across the Canadian Arctic’s Baffin Island. The expedition will be traveling with four Inuit dog teams over traditional hunting paths, up frozen rivers, through steep-sided fjords, over glaciers and ice caps, and across the sea ice to reach some of the most remote Inuit villages of the world.

Each day, the team will use innovative technologies to post video, images, sounds and text to the website, and communicate with online participants around the world.