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Hindu gods really know how to live

As the Hindu gods are “immortal” only in a very particular sense–for they are born and they die–they experience most of the great human dilemmas and often seem to differ from mortals in a few trivial details . . . and from demons even less. Yet they are regarded by Hindus as a class of beings by definition totally different from any other; they are symbols in a way that no human being, however “archetypal” his life story, can ever be. They are actors playing parts that are real only for us; they are the masks behind which we see our own faces.

–Wendy Doniger O’Flaherty Introduction, Hindu Myths (Penguin Books, 1975)

Caring for elderly in-laws

Me: (phone id indicates in-laws) Hello?
Caller: . . . .
Me: Hello?
Caller: . . .
Me: Hel. . .
Mother-in-law: Hello?
Me: Hello Margaret.
Mother-in-law: . . .
Me: Hello?  Margaret?
Mother-in-law: Chris?
Me: Yes, hello.
Mother-in-law: Can you hear me?  Are you there?
Me: Yes, I can hear you Margaret.  I’m here.
Mother-in-law: Oh, gosh.
Me: Do tell, kind lady,  what fresh disaster awaits?
Mother-in-law: What?
Me: How are you?
Mother-in-law: Well, not so good.
Me: How so?
Mother-in-law: Well, let me tell you . . .

characterized by or giving attention

Him: Blah blah blahblah yadda yadda wizbang, you know?  But that’s just me being anal.

Her: Huh.

Him: By the way, you were the first one to notice that.

Her: What?

Him: That I’m anal.

Her: Oh?

Him: Yeah.  ‘Cause I remember you were the first one to say I was anal attentive.

Her: Um . . .

Him: “Anal attentive.”  That was the first time I ever heard that before.

Her:  I . . .

Him: “You’re anal attentive,” you said.  And I got so mad at you!  You know why?

Her: Uh . . .

Him: Because I didn’t know what it meant!  Heh, heh.

Her:  . . .

Him: Yeah!  I thought you were calling me an asshole!!

Her: I think . . .

Him: What?

Her: Never mind.